An overdue apology
Jul. 29th, 2009 06:37 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
I wanted to give a week for everything to settle down and so I could collect my thoughts. I'm currently suspended from teaching and the team due to hurting quite a few people and I'd like to take responsibility for that right now. I shouldn't have projected my anger onto the employees of Snow Valley and I certainly should have been cautious enough and in enough control to not hurt Kyle. I am very sincerely sorry for all of those events. I know better and there's nothing excusing me from those decisions.
I owe several of you quite a bit and Kyle the most. I have no right to expect forgiveness but I'd like to do what I can to try to earn it. I try to look at the positive side of most things and I think this has helped me to understand some things I hope I can pass on to others when the time is right. I've made the decision that I'll gladly explain everything to anybody who wants to ask me about what happened so they can learn from my mistakes.
My favorite author, Robert A. Heinlein, wrote in "Starship Troopers" that "Violence is the ultimate authority from which all other authority is derived." I always believed that was wrong and that the ultimate authority was freedom. The same book also says that violence "has settled more issues in history than has any other factor." I had always believed that hope and mercy held that honor. Now I know that I was right. I hope that I can use my experience to help others and my new knowledge to make up for my mistakes.
I owe several of you quite a bit and Kyle the most. I have no right to expect forgiveness but I'd like to do what I can to try to earn it. I try to look at the positive side of most things and I think this has helped me to understand some things I hope I can pass on to others when the time is right. I've made the decision that I'll gladly explain everything to anybody who wants to ask me about what happened so they can learn from my mistakes.
My favorite author, Robert A. Heinlein, wrote in "Starship Troopers" that "Violence is the ultimate authority from which all other authority is derived." I always believed that was wrong and that the ultimate authority was freedom. The same book also says that violence "has settled more issues in history than has any other factor." I had always believed that hope and mercy held that honor. Now I know that I was right. I hope that I can use my experience to help others and my new knowledge to make up for my mistakes.
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Date: 2009-07-30 12:21 am (UTC)When you explain to people what happened, can you make it sound like I was a lot cooler and got a few licks in before you hit me?
I don't know that I think Heinlein was wrong but I don't think he was right either. I think he was kinda thinking too narrowly. Violence is a pretty damn strong authority but it's not an honest one. You hit a guy, he might do what you want once, but he's sure as hell not gonna like you and that's gonna make him not want to do more of what you want.
Unless it's Garrison hitting me, and then that's also totally different because that's learning to fight. Sometimes you gotta get hit to learn to throw a punch.
I forgot where I was going with this.
Oh, right. Fear isn't a good motivator is what I'm saying. Neither is hitting folks.
But I AM serious about the burrito.
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Date: 2009-07-30 12:28 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-30 02:44 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-30 12:37 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-30 02:44 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-30 01:22 am (UTC)As for the Heinlein quote, you're thinking too narrowly about violence. Law is based off of the idea of consequences for what are deemed unacceptable actions. Violence, be it physical, mental or social, are what the consequences are drawn from. You don't simply take what you want when you feel like it. Part of that is evolved from our conditioning that you don't because you will be in trouble. God will hate you. Daddy will yell. All of those things are a violence of a sort. Morals evolve as behaviour becomes more ingrained, so now the idea of simply, say, taking someone elses stuff just because you can is an abhorrent act, but it has developed into such because the first person who got his tribe together to stop it from happening built it on the basis of violent consequences for the actions. It goes from being practical, to being cultural, to being traditional, to being ethical.
That's what two degrees and twenty grand will get you, folks. The ability to blather on a closed journal system about Heinlein. Keep studying, stay in school, yadda yadda...
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Date: 2009-07-30 02:14 am (UTC)Heinlein was, of course, writing against those quotes; for those of you not familiar with him.
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Date: 2009-07-30 02:20 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-30 03:15 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-30 03:24 am (UTC)I seriously doubt these things have a single answer. Mind you, I got one of my degrees in psychology, not philosophy, so I tend to take everything as being largely a human creation.
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Date: 2009-07-30 03:29 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-30 03:40 am (UTC)So, in the midst of a liberal arts college in Vermont, it would be considered henious and wrong to shoot someone who broke into your house and tried to make off with your television. In a farming town in the midst of Florida, your neighbours would firnly endorse your actions. Are the people in Vermont right and the ones in Florida wrong? Or vice versa? If there is a central truth to discover, one or the other has to be the case. I personally feel it has to be more complex than that.
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Date: 2009-07-30 03:47 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-30 07:11 am (UTC)An answer somewhere, for me, is an article of faith. My faith is mostly with people.
I admit, I do plan for some kind of conversation as a very old man to the ones that give me the garden full of nubile virgins or the mead hall of eternal drunkness, but I blame that solely on poor rolemodels.
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Date: 2009-07-30 02:48 am (UTC)I dunno, I haven't read Starship Troopers in like, two years and I didn't like it enough to wanna think about it that hard.
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Date: 2009-07-30 03:25 am (UTC)And no, I no longer smell like burnt hair.
Dick.
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Date: 2009-07-30 04:15 am (UTC)Hey, that twenty grand also bought you the vocabulary to make you sound like you're smarter than you are Mountie Man.
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Date: 2009-07-30 05:01 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-30 05:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-30 05:55 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-30 05:57 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-30 07:08 am (UTC)So, like every CBC production.
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Date: 2009-07-30 04:09 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-30 05:56 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-01 02:40 pm (UTC)They will still be twitching.
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Date: 2009-08-01 06:39 pm (UTC)